I’ve brought along a few orc captains I’ve spared and recruited for my little invasion, but I’m certainly not going to bring along Târz Hot-Head, who wields two flaming axes and wears a metal hat with a portable bonfire. The orcs I’ve caught tell me Krímp is immune to fire damage.
I still need his fortress, and I’d love to spare him and make him a bodyguard, if only for the humiliation factor of rhyming my foes to death. Fortunately he shatters that thought when we meet in person and he blurts the cringy battlecry “Your fate has gone from bad to worse / You face an orc who speaks in verse!” Some crimes can’t go unpunished. That bycocket with the two red feathers that match the shafts in his quiver. That immaculately crafted leather jerkin.
The orc in charge is a dainty fellow who calls himself Krímp the Rhymer, and I can’t help but admire his fashion sense in this grubby world. I never thought I’d be playing Pokémon with Tolkienian orcs, but here I am in Middle-earth: Shadow of War, standing with my army before the fortress of Khargukôr amid the snowy peaks of Seregost.
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